Alexander came home from work on Saturday at around three... feeling victorious as usual. He was just "so tired" or "utterly exhausted" as he would usually say. He busted in through the front door like he usually does... kicked off his shoes and jumped into a lounging position on the couch painted with 60s style flowers.
"Can I have some cookies and some milk please?" he asked (demanded).
"Well sure, they're in the kitchen Alexander..." I replied, halfway kidding.
"Grandmaaaaaaaa! I'm too tired! I had to wake up at 6:30 this morning and work for like.. eight hours. Can you please just get it for me!?" he said, desperately.
"Alright alright Alexander... you just like staying here because I give you everything you want... I'm basically you're slave!" I said.
"That's not true Grandma... I love you," he said... probably with a devilish smirk.
He ate the cookies... and some chips.. and some Reese's... and a bagel... and probably a lot of other stuff that I'll have to go buy more of soon...
He's eating me out of house and home. He's taking at least forty dollars or so every week... My body, my mind, my wallet can't afford this lifestyle.
He left the house around six, after he was all ready to go out on the town... in my car..except while he was leaving he blatantly was carrying a bottle of alcohol. He walked past me with it in his hand as if he thought I was dumb enough to not even know what it was... of course my passive self didn't say anything as he put it into the trunk of the car and kissed me on the cheek, saying goodbye. I told him to be home before 12 but I knew that I wouldn't be seeing him until at least 2 in the morning.
I woke up the next morning and made Alexander French toast. He always told me how bad he wanted in Sunday morning because it was the only day he got to sleep in and relax. He strolled into the kitchen around 11 a.m., with the first words out of his mouth being "Did you make French toast for me Grandma?" I didn't do anything besides sigh and put the two pieces of French toast on the table.
He then said, with a mouthful of food, "Can we go to the mall today? I need some khaki shorts." I obliged of course... how could I deny his wishes ever? I just couldn't for some reason.
He pranced around the store... taking far too long for my liking to pick out some shorts. I saw a girl named Lola skipping around the store too... without a care in the world. She was carrying some pears and offered me one but I don't really care for pears. I remember when I was Lola's age... without a care in the world besides walking around and teasing young men with my beauty. Now, my face was wrinkled and my skin didn't have its softness it once had in a previous life.
Alexander walked up to me and unloaded about 4 or 5 different garments into my arms, which were already carrying an umbrella, an overcoat, and a purse.
"I thought you were just getting khaki shorts?" I asked, knowing beforehand that he would surely get more than that.
"Grandma... I have to get at least two outfits for the Spring time... don't you want me to look nice and impress on the little Jewish girls?" he said, knowing I couldn't say no.
"Alright Alexander alright alright. Get your clothes, but this isn't happening every weekend," I said.
We went up to the cashier and I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the total.
"250 dollars!?" I gasped.
"Come on Grandma, that's not too bad... clothes are getting more expensive now," he said, snatching my credit card out of my hand, handing it to the lady and then forging my signature on the receipt.
To make matters worse, it was raining pretty hard when we left the store and my hair was ruined... Alexander said he needed the umbrella because he was wearing new sandals (that I had bought him the week before). I can't drive in the rain but he made me because he said he wanted to look at his new clothes on the way home...
someone, put me out of my misery.
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Oscar Alcazar
It wasn't the rain that bothered Oscar. Nor was it the police, or even the intruders. It was business, business, business. Anybody would be wary of flashing blue lights, especially when they're parked outside Oscar's. No, the cops themselves were no trouble. A wad of bills each and they'd stay out of his hair, or what hair he had left, that is. What troubled him was the shop. After TWO SWORDFIGHTERS FELL THROUGH THE SKYLIGHT................ there was a bit of cleaning up to do. Once again, he'd get Alexander to do it. Hopefully it wouldn't hurt business.
And in the morning, the rain was starting to clear up. He threw on an XXL A-shirt, grabbed his basketball, and braved the rain for some free throws down at the park. His days of running were long gone, but his massive arms could stroke a shot like nobody's business. And he could box out with the best of them.
Slicks was already layin' some up by the time Oscar's pristine Cadillac rolled into the parking lot. The rims glinted as the morning sun peered through clouds of rain. "Yo, let's warm up with a little h-o-r-s-e, bro," Charlie said.
"Whatever floats your boat, lil guy," Oscar replied.
As Charlie's shot sunk, giving Oscar an "O," he turned to see a sizzlin' Maserati pull up next to his ride.
"Damn, what is this, a car show or something?" Charlie exclaimed.
"Nuh-uh man, this is business," Oscar said.
Machelli cracked his window. "You better start your engine, son. We got trouble. Follow me."
Oscar ruffled Charlie's hair, grabbed his ball, and slunk into his plush leather interior. As the key rotated, the steady beat of Lupe Fiasco's "Put You On Game" filled his chubby ears. He reversed and swerved, kicking up dust and gravel, and speeding off after Machelli's speedster. he looked out the window. Squinting, he picked out the name "Victoria Lampshade." Did he really see taxidermy? Really? Wow, maybe a butcher and a taxidermist could do a little business. He could use the meat, she could use the hide.
He looked forward, gazing through Machelli's Maserati back window. He could have sworn he saw the faint outline of Grandma Pearl's curls, bouncing in the back seat. No, he thought, it couldn't be.
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